5k Training and Golf Balls

 

ebay

My next goal is to build up speed. I'd like to run 3.1 miles in under 30 minutes as if it were 2010. So striders and other forms of quickness-building exercises join my training regimen. 

I've been stretching out in a new location within sight of the Wilson-Harding Golf Course. It is absolutely golf ball heaven. On Monday I collected seven—a new record. Do I golf? No. Do I give them to golfers? Sometimes. Do I throw them at rude drivers? Not yet. 

There's a site online that offers seventy cents a ball. This could be a nice cottage industry to supplement my golden years. A Merry Christmas to all!   

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Motorcyclist Identifies as Bicyclist

 Deep inside, he knew his true identity.

The Babylon Bee

Paul Rugg and Lucky Aid the Elderly

 Lucky the Therapy Dog has passed but his memory remains among the old.

Paul Rugg's Froynlaven

Paul Rugg and I are Hired at Warner Bros. v. 5

And I Have the Memories to Prove It

Today, December 16, marked 27 years since Paul Rugg and I were offered jobs at Warner Brothers TV Animation. We were over at Paul's house watching Zontar: Thing From Venus, drinking coffee, eating chocolate donuts, and smoking. We'd just turned in scripts for some new show called Animaniacs. (Mine was "Draculee, Draculaa.") Paul's wife was off earning money as a social worker, while my future wife was still employed at the magazine I'd quit two months earlier. Rugg and I were performing improv and sketch comedy at the Acme Comedy Theatre. (Along with cast member Adam Carolla.) Money was very tight. The payment for one script would really help out my Christmas. 

Then Kathy Page, Tom Ruegger's assistant, called to offer us staff jobs and the trajectory of our lives veered sharply into an unexplored cosmos.

We were amazed, stunned, numb. Walking outside, we smoked more and talked it over. Should we take the jobs or would they pollute our comedy pureness by turning it commercial? We would accept the work immediately. 

Now it all seems opaque. If it weren't for the Web and talking to Paul Rugg yesterday, I'd swear the whole experience never happened. But I'm glad it did. (Paul, too.)  So thanks to Tom and Sherri Stoner. (And her husband, M.D. Sweeney, our Acme director, who recommended us.)

Note: After thirteen years of blogging, I'm running out of life events to chronicle.

Notes: 2019

A little hyperbole last year. I have plenty of life events and more on the way. Now then, Paul's episode was about a pet shop, I believe. In 1991 I wrote on a Mac Classic. (They look so quaint now, like a fancy radio from 1938.) Jeffrey Dahmer, Silence of the Lambs, Thelma and Louise, the unraveling of the Soviet Union and the number of computers on the newly commercialized Web reached one million.

Not mine, but similar.

Notes: 2020

What a year! (Wednesday will be 29 years, but close enough.) Pandemics, riots, politics. It's like 1968 on crystal meth. What's new? Well. You can now obtain the Top 5 Dating Tips of H.P. Lovecraft. Yes, that weird horror guy. For details, go to this nifty spot. 

Notes: 2021

NOW it's 30 years. After three decades, events merge together into a clot of time. But I'll never forget that day. A life-changer. 

Book Review: Paths of Glory

 

Paths of Glory by Humphrey Cobb
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Author Humphrey Cobb knew his subject matter. Wounded while serving with the Canadian Army in World War I, his tale of a vain general, a failed attack, an unjust trial and the fate of three soldiers was compelling enough for filmmaker Stanley Kubrick to adapt into his classic film Paths of Glory.

Fast and compelling, Cobb's book captures the brutality and carnage of the Western Front as well as the army's indifference and passive obedience that allows the perpetuation of a cruel injustice.

Under three hundred pages, the book is told from multiple points of view, with grim details of trench warfare and the doomed outlook of the soldiers underscoring a dark tale of military injustice and the reduction of men to chips in a vast rigged game.

View all my reviews

Book Review: The Afghanistan Papers

 

The Afghanistan Papers: A Secret History of the War by Craig Whitlock
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

It seems everyone in the government wants to chat about their work as long as they aren't on the record. Thanks to a pair of lawsuits by the Washington Post we now have insight into 0fficial thinking by politicians, generals, and assorted bureaucrats on America's longest conflict. It is maddening.

Former Ambassador Richard Boucher: "First we went in to get al-Qaida and to get al-Qaeda out of Afghanistan . . .we did that. The Taliban was shooting back at us so we started shooting at them . . . . Ultimately, we kept expanding the mission."

Army General Dan McNeil "quickly judged that the United States and NATO didn't have a coherent war strategy."

"U.S. and NATO officials belatedly recognized that drug-related corruption was . . . threatening to turn Afghanistan into . . . a 'narco-state.'"

[General} McKiernan had violated an unspoken rule . . . he did not deceive the public with specious language . . ."

McKiernan was fired in 2009 for telling the truth and the lesson was not lost on later generals. Happy talk or face retirement.

And on it goes. Two generations of government officials lied and dissembled. And only McKiernan lost his job. (General McCrystal was fired for making fun of civilian officials such as Joe Biden.)

Author Whitlock published the book before the chaos of our departure. He mentions President Biden visiting Arlington National Cemetery, Section 60, where the dead of Iraq and Afghanistan are buried. ". . . he [the President] gazed into the distance, surveying row upon row of white marble gravestones. 'Hard to believe," he murmured. 'Look at them all.'"

A little later he added thirteen more.

View all my reviews

FakeMask USA

 Unfogged Glasses?

Yes, indeed. Thanks to FakeMask USA you can purchase a mesh mask allowing one to wear spectacles, see clearly, and conform to various pandemic theatre mandates. I eagerly await this fine product.

Greta Climate Scold Doll

 Order now while supplies last!

The Babylon Bee

Prostate Cancer Real Talk Episode 7

 Cancer survivor and support leader Clarence Williamson discusses the importance of regular check-ups and the value of men helping other men in their fight against this wide-spread disease.

Prostate Cancer Real Talk

Pearl Harbor at Eighty

UPDATE: Eight decades later, the memory endures.

Despite Lend-Lease, America's first peacetime draft, and the sinking of the Reuben James, a majority of Americans were against entering the strife in Europe—again. Until the Japanese attacked Pearl Harbor. Four days later, Hitler declared war on the U.S., backing up his Japanese ally. And suddenly the United States found itself marinating in World War II. 

And for all the subsequent conflicts this country has known, the Second World War was the last one that saw Congress issue a formal declaration of war. 

Below are a few thoughts from the Silver Anniversary.

History

Before 9/11 There Was 12/07

I don't want to say "Happy Anniversary" because it wasn't a very happy day 75 years ago. Over 2,000 American servicemen and civilians died during Japan's surprise attack on our Pearl Harbor naval and air facilities. If I may wax historical, two things really saved the U.S.:

A. Our aircraft carriers were out at sea.

B. The Japanese didn't bomb the Navy's fuel tanks because the smoke would obscure their bombing and torpedo runs on our battleships. 

Without aircraft carriers, it's likely there would've been no Coral Sea and the Japanese would have successfully invaded southern New Guinea and cut off all supplies to Australia.

Minus Hawaiian Island fuel, American warships would've needed to top off back in the continental United States and the Pacific War might've drug on long enough to get my father killed, hence eliminating my Dec. 7 blog posts decades before they began. 

Here's a sample post from 2007:

"A day of infamy," said President Franklin Roosevelt about the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor, December 7, 1941. (On a documentary, a surviving sailor recalled his reaction less poetically: "Holy smokes! Those are Japs! This is the real McCoy!") Reams have been written about what FDR knew and when he knew it. As the United States had broken the Japanese diplomatic code, there was speculation that the president deliberately withheld knowledge of impending attack from the military so as to use the bombing as an excuse to enter World War II.


Also check out:

Time and Mrs. Murphy from 2008

Not Everyone Mourned from 2009.

Famous People Born on My Birthday v.7

 THIS POST AGAIN?

Well, it is my birthday, after all. And for your information my inbox was stuffed this morning with four birthday wishes:

A. My cousin Jim.

B. Southern California Aquatics swimming club.

C. The eye institute that cleared up my cataracts.

D. A digestive health center that I must have visited at one time.

Has much changed since last year? Yes, as a matter of fact. After 13 years of injuries, operations, and illnesses, including two varieties of cancer, I completed a marathon. I'm in the process or writing a short book detailing my journey as well as a trio of horror/thriller eBooks. Each of the three stands alone. All feature characters confronted with life-threatening decisions courtesy of a sinister entity called the Bureau of Different Science. I've hit upon a new outlining method and am looking forward to the results. Hopefully, readers will feel the same. 

These people were also born on December 5th. Mostly giddy-looking young people; how many have you heard of? Here's a more mature list. Enjoy productive lives!

Thank you very much to all who have, so far, wished me Happy Birthday. In thinking of this day, I am reminded of several famous Americans who share my date of birth. I will list three and examine their accomplishments as compared to mine.

1. Martin Van Buren - b. Dec. 5, 1782

2. George Armstrong Custer - b. Dec. 5, 1839

3. Walt Disney - b. Dec. 5, 1901

4. John P. McCann - b. Dec. 5, 1952

1. Martin Van Buren succeeded greatly in becoming the 8th President of the United States but was hardly remembered even in his own day. He had a large bull frog stuffed and used as an ink well in the White House. However President Taft later sat on it by accident and they had to throw the thing out. That's about it.

2. George Armstrong Custer succeeded greatly as a soldier in the Civil War but had a mixed record fighting Indians. (1-1-2, I think.) He is best remembered for his  spectacular fail at the Battle of the  Little Big Horn. At first, everything was going well; then it all fell apart under an Indian tsunami. In later years, Custer had a park named after him as well as a monument and a movie where his part was played by Errol Flynn. That's a whole lot more than Van Buren ever got.

3. Walt Disney succeeded greatly in animation, a pioneer in the field, creator of iconic characters—but not the word 'iconic' which has been seized upon by junior execs.—established Disney studios and Disneyland and is fondly remembered to this day. Nonetheless his body is frozen in a vault beneath Disney's Burbank lot and should Walt be reanimated and start making decisions again it could effect his legacy.

4. John P. McCann was greatly successful as a Hollywood atmosphere player. McCann was the ship-board stand-in for a Canadian actor portraying Errol Flynn in My Wicked, Wicked Ways. In addition, he is visible catching Dennis Quaid's jacket at around 1:19 in a clip from  Great Balls of Fire.
More successful in animation, McCann created the non-iconic character of The Huntsman. For the next fifteen years, he piggy-backed onto as many successful shows as his friends would allow. While the record is still being written, outsiders agree that McCann will be remembered by Bank of America and several other creditors who might reasonably feel aggrieved should he pass from the scene within the next several months.

Images: whitehouse.gov, Parcbench, fold3