Paul Rugg and I are Hired at Warner Bros. v.3

And I Have the Memories to Prove It

Today, December 16, marked 27 years since Paul Rugg and I were offered jobs at Warner Brothers TV Animation. We were over at Paul's house watching Zontar: Thing From Venus, drinking coffee, eating chocolate donuts, and smoking. We'd just turned in scripts for some new show called Animaniacs. (Mine was "Draculee, Draculaa.") Paul's wife was off earning money as a social worker, while my future wife was still employed at the magazine I'd quit two months earlier. Rugg and I were performing improv and sketch comedy at the Acme Comedy Theatre. (Along with cast member Adam Carolla.) Money was very tight. The payment for one script would really help out my Christmas. 

Then Kathy Page, Tom Ruegger's assistant, called to offer us staff jobs and the trajectory of our lives veered sharply into an unexplored cosmos.

We were amazed, stunned, numb. Walking outside, we smoked more and talked it over. Should we take the jobs or would they pollute our comedy pureness by turning it commercial? We would accept the work immediately. 

Now it all seems opaque. If it weren't for the Web and talking to Paul Rugg yesterday, I'd swear the whole experience never happened. But I'm glad it did. (Paul, too.)  So thanks to Tom and Sherri Stoner. (And her husband, M.D. Sweeney, our Acme director, who recommended us.)

Note: After thirteen years of blogging, I'm running out of life events to chronicle.

Notes: 2019

A little hyperbole last year. I have plenty of life events and more on the way. Now then, Paul's episode was about a pet shop, I believe. In 1991 I wrote on a Mac Classic. (They look so quaint now, like a fancy radio from 1938.) Jeffrey Dahmer, Silence of the Lambs, Thelma and Louise, the unraveling of the Soviet Union and the number of computers on the newly commercialized Web reached one million.

Not mine, but similar.

Horror: California Now on Kindle

Now on Amazon in Kindle Format.

Noble Anthology Includes MY Story

I am a bit prejudiced when it comes to my short stories in print. Even if you haven't been waiting, pretend you have for the glee that comes with anticipation fulfilled. Here in Kindle, among other tales, waits "Mark of the Bruja." When an ancient evil nests inside a Hollywood apartment, only a narcissistic director and a drunken housepainter stand a shot at stopping the ghastly murder of children.

A softcover version of the anthology is rumored in the works from Soteira Press, but I can't say more and wouldn't since I have no good information on the subject.

Update: Scratch that rumor. The softcover edition is available for your post-holiday horror reading.

Key & Peele and Hogwarts

When it comes to wizarding schools, mileage may vary.

Key and Peele

Short Story Sale Back in the Day

Ah,  2009

Obama, Madoff, Sully Sullenburger, the Underwear Bomber, Avatar, over 9% unemployment, Yankees win the World Series, and I sell my first short fiction piece. And now a decade has passed. I was a blogging machine back then with 29 posts in November alone and a record 365 posts for the year. I was also posting on another blog and working vigorously on my Ten-in-Six plan.

After selling a short story in 2012, I abandoned shorts in favor of fiction novel first drafts. The results were fantastic. From 2013 to 2018, I completed two or three novel first drafts per year. Like the lazy slug I am, only a handful have seen publication as essays or novellas or actual books - a parody, a horror novel, and an autobiography.

Dismayed, I focused this year on short stories. And while I've only sold one, it felt quite pleasing to notch a sale for the first time in seven years. "Mark of the Bruja" will appear in the Horror: California anthology due out soon. Can an arrogant young playwright and a drunken old house painter stop an ancient evil from nesting in a Hollywood apartment building?

Pick up a copy, read, enjoy.

In the meantime, I type away, attempting to complete a short story that has grown into a novella. Provided I don't fall back into old habits of sloth characterized by web surfing dolphin videos and fat people skate boarding, I should publish by the end of January.

An unwritten plan of action is a wish list.

Surfers Point 5k Race Report

A docile Pacific Ocean.

Sea Side Race Sees Chilly Start

Cold down near the beach at 6:45 AM. Forty-seven degrees Fahrenheit according to the thermometer in our warm SUV. Back in sultry September, a nice cool beachfront run in Venture seemed a sterling idea. Not so much that morning.

Warming up with t'ai chi.

That Sunday, 5k-10k-half and full marathons were on the running menu for 361 participants. I love these smaller races. Running 5ks in LA, I usually have that many people just in my age group. Here is the 5k breakdown:

For the 3.1 mile run there were 90 participants; 36 men and 54 women, including my wife Joy—running/walking with me for the first time in 26 years. I stressed to Joy the importance of relaxation, fun, and breaking into a trot at the sight of an event photographer. (You can always shuffle later.)

Out and Back, Mostly Up, Then Mostly Down

Forget the milling cattle starts of big city races. Here the field opened up pretty early, save for a bike trail climb up from the beach. My Chi Running form worked well uphill. I was able to pass any number of huffing-puffing runners without significant increase in my cardio. This is highly motivating when you're old and overweight. Downhills were wheeee fun as I let gravity do the work.

Joy spots a photographer.

After the turnaround, I focused on passing the runner in front of me. This only worked when they were older and fatter. Nonetheless, I soon spied the parking lot and a cadre of high school cheerleaders recruited into encouraging the runners. Later in the morning, I noticed they broke into enthusiastic shouts whenever a cute guy ran past. For me, they didn't even stand up. ("You're almost there." Yawn.)

 And soon I was across the finish line. I handily beat both women in the race with strollers. Like Griffith Park, my form disintegrated trying to hustle at the end. However, this time I emerged without injury. And something else . . . .

Ready For Product Endorsements

. . . my very first age group medal. I was the third fastest in the 60 - 69 age group. (35:05; an 11:17 pace.)   Of course, there were only about eight of us, four on walkers and two on life-support, but, still, I'm prepared for any marketing opportunities or speaking engagements that arise. Except for Nike. Brooks, yes.

Joy displays her finish line bling.

A man glutted with medals. 

 A fine race and a pleasant mini-vacation for Joy and I. We might just give Surfers Point another try in May. Should my training progress, I'm considering the 10k worthy of my best efforts.  More on our plans soon.

Veterans Day 2019 and USMC B-Day

Greetings and Grief

Traveling yesterday, so a happy belated birthday to the United States Marine Corps. A long time ago, I myself stood on the yellow footprints. Since then, at least two guys from my neighborhood who enlisted with me—Tom Poto and Steve Lovell—have passed on. And so it goes.  Happy 244 to all my fellow Marines, especially Tom, Steve, and Kurt Macholtz. Semper Fi!

Marine Corps Recruiting

I won't say "Happy" Veterans Day, since its purpose was not time off from work but remembrance of sacrifice and loss. Below is a fascinating—short—video illuminating the casualties of World War I by country. Think of someone you know. When you see coffins, think of that person filling one coffin. See how many coffins you can fill with friends, family and acquaintances, good and bad. Countries lose soldiers, individuals and families lose more. And so, as nations, we remember.

MetaBall Studios

Prostate Book Prospers

Hot Prostate Book Finds a Friend

A metaphorical friend, to be sure, but a powerful one by any standard. What in the name of hickory do I mean? It all involves mysterious Amazon algorithms.

Honor by Association

Note the screen shot. My book is displayed as often being purchased with Dr. Patrick Walsh's definitive tome on prostate cancer. (Which I drew upon in my work. Walsh's book also happens to be co-authored by award-winning science writer—and most excellent supporter of my writing—Janet Farrar Worthington. ) Then, I'm linked yet again to the Walsh text in the "Also Bought" section. Wondrous additional promotion. It never hurts to pal around with #1.

Also (see above) I'm #6 in my softcover book category.

But What Have We Here?

Nothing less than my softcover and ebook occupying adjacent spots in the top 30 of all-encompassing category prostate health. (Such excellent positioning for an indie author.) Enough. My arm aches from patting me on the back.

Hallow Mass and Stalinfest 2019

quote ideas

No posts, nothing, a ringing silence, then a plug for Hallow Mass. Fancy a bit of seasonal scares and a boot in the butt to political correctness, give this horror-comedy tale a try.

Most of you may go away now as I intend to delve into things Stalinist.

My friend Dutch, author and raconteur, is moving after 35 years in Hollywood. I shared his dwelling for six of those years and remember the time as darn interesting. A ferocious reader, Dutch encouraged me to rummage through his book collection, an assortment mighty by any standard. Given our mutual love of history, I selected several books on a cheery little topic called Stalinism.

As an appetizer, I re-read Darkness at Noon. Arthur Koestler's fictional depiction of an old Red caught up in the meat-grinder of the Moscow Show Trials teased the palate, preparing me for the historically nourishing:

The Great Terror: A Reassessment by Robert Conquest. Reviewer Larry Slawson says:

"[Conquest's} reliance on such a wide variety of sources, in turn makes [the] book feel both informative and very scholarly in its overall approach. Conquest also possesses a superior writing style that showcases itself time and again throughout each chapter. The end result is a historical work that reads more like a novel with its narrative-driven style."

 I met Robert Conquest at the LA Times Festival of Books back in 2003. He mentioned a certain pride in deducing the terror's casualty figures. Considering the book was first released in 1968, I give the man mad respect. Back then, nothing emerged from the Soviet Union save weapons and propaganda, and several tank brigades for the disobedient Czechs. Amazed was I  by Conquest's accuracy as subsequent history would prove. (Sounded a bit like Yoda, did I.)

A break may be needed after "Terror." A stroll, a bit of fiction, I think.

Back to the table after my walk and right into a second Robert Conquest book, Harvest of Sorrow. From a review at Barnes and Noble we learn that those harvested were peasants of the Soviet Union in 1932 - 33. Stalin caused:

"a "terror-famine," inflicted by the State on the collectivized peasants of the Ukraine and certain other areas by setting impossibly high grain quotas, removing every other source of food, and preventing help from outside—even from other areas of the Soviet Union—from reaching the starving populace. The death toll resulting from the actions described in this book was an estimated 14.5 million—more than teetotal number of deaths for all countries in World War I."

Quite the under reported slaughter, though the New York Times reporter Walter Duranty wrote that everything was just fine and, besides, who couldn't stand to lose a few pounds? That's why I was glad to discover a few years back that Anne Applebaum had written Red Famine: Stalin's War on the Ukraine. Her book will constitute Stalinfest dessert as I look forward to encountering such new information as might have emerged since Conquest's 1986 book.

Anyone left reading? I thought not.

Thank You, People of The Netherlands!

gamblerspost.com

For reasons known only in Holland, I received almost 1,500 hits from the Dutch over the last several days. Ah, but why? What website or publication sparked this North Sea surge? Good or bad? Positive or lurid? (I enjoyed the acting of the late Rutger Hauer, but was modest in my praise.) If anyone in Holland is late to the party and writes English, please leave a message explaining the interest.

Working on Book 2 of my Hallow Mass trilogy. Since August 8, I have written 32,519 words coming out to 109 pages. Keep in mind that Truman Capote's novella Breakfast at Tiffany's rolled in at 108 pages. (That's the 1993 Vintage Books edition.) Comparisons? We both follow female protagonists and my current efforts are one page longer. That's about it.

Yet, out of my 32k worth of repetition and word bilge, there skulks a story about teaching, power, and the price of blind arrogance, all adorned in a dark urban fantasy hoodie. When will this tale see print? Right now, I'm thinking next March. First in line is my long short story on transgenic beasts and corruption as a young baseball player hopes to slide to safety in the face of an environmental experiment gone haywire.

"Eat Out" will be my first work published using Draft 2 Digital, a software program that formats your ebooks, then places same in markets such as Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and Apple Books. Similar to Smashwords, but the formatting process is reputed to be friendlier.

Should sales be brisk, I'll certainly include an edition in Dutch.

iamexpat.ni

Prostate Surgery Softcover Picking Up Steam

Durable Softcover Climbs the Rankings.

Up it goes, wedged in with dreary texts on machines lopping open men and removing certain organs soiled by cancer. My autobiography. Currently No. 7 and certain to rise higher. Of this, I am certain. And, yes, it is still available in glossy ebook format. Who knew cancer could be so profitable? I'd settle for a number of dry days, but those are the wishes of yesterday. Still, modest literary note is delightful and I'm going to continue saying as much.

huffington post

Vancouver Vacation and Washington Sunshine

Behold, the 32nd longest cable suspension bridge in the world!

Flying to Vancouver, then driving down to Washington, we passed over the Alex Fraser Bridge. A fine bridge with adequate lane space and no gaps in the roadway. All I ask for in a bridge. Despite the rain, and crappy airlines, we enjoyed ourselves and the favorable exchange rates currently available in Canada.

In Washington, we were fortunate to experience a sunny day. I went out for a short run—my first in the state since 2008—and observed the fabled Mt. Rainer.

In between the pole and some trees. Not much, I know. 

Better, more photogenic, views arose later but my camera was not available. Great to see the cousins and relax after a hectic time in Vancouver. Before leaving, my weight was down to 245 from a high of 271 in March. But I fear vacation eating has edged the scale back up. Then I'll start again, by heavens.