Keeper's America

Employing a giant map, Keeper sings "Wakko's America."

On the Nose with Basel Squamous

A shout-out to family and friends who checked in yesterday. All the prayers and little bits of encouragement helped in many ways as I look forward to getting the bandage off today and appearing only mildly deformed to the general public.

Between the wound draining and a big nose bandage, I slept poorly last night. Today, Ernesto drove me to the doctor's for yet another blood test, this one concerning anemia. I thanked my doc for catching the cancer. I'm like a medical windfall to him; every week, something new from tendinitis to anemia to cancer. Perhaps my story will make the New England Journal of Medicine as the Amazing Often-Sick California Man. (Then I can claim it as a publishing credit.)

"Take That Hook Out."

One of the many charming medical phrases I heard during outpatient surgery today. ("Blot" was another.) The cancer was more aggressive, deeper and wider than expected. They had to go in twice to cut everything out, then do a skin graft to cover the wound. Luckily, the cancer didn't migrate into the cartilage or I'd be Mr. Odd Nose. (Clever remarks notwithstanding.) Or worse. Anyway, my wife hung out while the doctors did their medical chores, then drove us home. Blood keeps draining into my mouth, making everything taste like I'm eating at the craft service table on Dawn of the Dead. But I'll take such minor discomforts. In the world of cancer, I skated big time.

Cereal Killer

An ugly rumor swirling about the animation industry. As part of the First Lady's childhood obesity program, the government is considering banning food advertising from cartoon shows. No Happy Meals, Count Chocula, or Snickers. In an ailing industry, this would be a major kick in the private parts. Let's hope its just scuttlebutt. Cartoons wouldn't be the same with tofu ads.

Onion Video on Hiding our Nation's Porn

We don't want to look bad...really.

Congress Announces Plan To Hide Nation's Porn From Future Generations

5Ks All Day

Emil gives the run-down on Carlsbad.

Tomorrow Bear

Dancing bear by day, crime-fighting scientist by night!
Thanks to takineko and Maz for the awesome artwork and color as I finish up the text and prepare to re-pitch this re-tooled idea. If I'd had any art this good the first time around we'd all be living large.