Friday, June 26, 2009

Farewell to Bees

Sometimes I think of the house I sold last year, home to us for twelve years - longer than anywhere I'd ever lived. I miss watching the San Gabriel Mountains, especially at dusk, as the sun flung out massive shadows, burning a bright red as it dipped into the Pacific.

But I don't miss the stinking bees. (Or rabbits, or coyotes, but they have their separate tales.)

The bees didn't actually smell as in insects that stung and stunk up the place. But this time of year they'd swarm, and a swarm would descend on my house, and it would cost a hundred bucks to de-bee. Scouts arrived first, whistling, six hands in their pockets, pretending to pollinate a flower, but really casing the place. Next day I'd hear a loud buzzing from under the house or under an eave and once inside a gardening box on the balcony, indicating they'd successfully immigrated. You've heard the expression, "Busy as a bee?"Well they are brutally industrious. First they build a comb for the queen. If unmolested,  that modest little comb cottage will become a bee high-rise. After one of my Southeast Asia journeys, I returned after three weeks to find a massive bee sub-division. The structure they'd built on the underside of my split level was intricate and astounding, and heavy with honey. Even the exterminator was impressed, admitting later he'd used up all the poison in his canister just to whack this one mega colony. Stuck with clean-up, I had to climb a tall ladder and knock down the sub-division with a rake, ducking chunks of honey-filled wax dropping past my head to splat on the dirt.  This new mess had to be policed at once because various animals would be drawn to the scent of honey and die from bee poison. Hollywood is so much like that and it thrives on buzz. 

Anyway, today I finished my animated script, sent it in, invoiced and napped, and didn't have to bee wrangle. That's got me feeling pretty darn good. 

NOTE: I tried explaining all the above to the new owner, but he and his wife laughed merrily. "We love bees. My father wants to put a hive in the backyard." Clearly, this was a man who fancied bees, in a family of bee fanciers. I hope they still do.  

4 comments:

takineko said...

Well if they fancy bees I guess they picked the right house.

Bees are going extinct, you'll be happy to know.. well maybe you won't be when you realize we're supposed to go extinct 4 years after bees.. for some reason.

JP Mac said...

My bee exterminator friends mentioned something like that.

And since they aren't costing me money, time and labor any more, I wish the bees well.

Kate said...

As the number of bee colonies continue to take a dive, there's a new 'mobile' cottage industry afoot. Folks in big trucks are going around the country to orchards and so forth with giant colonies of bees for hire. They make the contract, let the bees out for a period of time to pollinate the crop -then it's 'everybody back in the bus' as they move on to the next paying bee gig.
Nobody could make this stuff up so early in the morning,you know.

JP Mac said...

That would make a good, short documentary film: Migrant Bees.

Especially if they go on strike.

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