Write Enough has obtained information suppressed by the L.A. Times. Undisclosed sources report the Times has possession of a video tape showing the murder of gibbon activist Ingrid Bunt. An outspoken defender of lessor apes, Bunt believed they were as intelligent as humans and superior to teenage males and members of congress. In 2003, her body was found on Monkey Island at the Tucson Zoo. Police believed Bunt was murdered while attempting to register gibbons to vote.
Long thought to have been slain by nomad bums, Bunt was killed by gibbons. According to sources, the footage shows Bunt holding out a form to a gibbon while she pantomimes signing. The gibbon distracts her with cute, touching gestures that indicate understanding. Meanwhile, a second gibbon creeps up behind Bunt and riddles her with a Glock .40 caliber. Tossing the pistol into the moat, the gibbons emptied Bunt's purse, ignoring credit cards but keeping a compact mirror and a package of mints. Later, footage showed one gibbon using the mirror to direct sunlight into the eyes of a mountain goat. The second gibbon traded the mints to a female in exchange for sex and flea removal.
What is the Times afraid of? Release the tape today or be branded "monkey pawn." Of course, nowhere in all this do we learn of any gibbon remorse. To this day, they loll about their island, well-fed, waiting, waiting, waiting.
3 comments:
Of course it involves the LA times! If you recall the times was bought (And taken PRIVATE!!!!!!!) by a man named Zell, from Chicago!!!! His name has two "L"s in it like Gorilla, an "E" and a "Z" like Chimpanzee and everyone at KTLA (Co-owned by Zell) is a baboon, maybe even Mandrills a species of Baboon with, you guessed it, two "L"s in it. I can't talk now, the monkey in the tiny round hat and cavalry tunic is back. He's been watching me since the organ grinder dropped him off.
No sudden moves.
They carry derringers.
I have seen the footage. I had a friends who worked for the Times and invited to drop by after the Sunday edition went to press and we both watched. It was the most disturbing thing I have ever witnessed, except perhaps for that video of the guy who kept slapping his neck as he swallowed an entire 10-lb. Virginia ham. The gibbons seemed to know exactly what they were doing. The repeated firing of the Glock was sadistic --I mean, I know these bastards have opposable thumbs, but this was clearly premeditated.
Worse than the murder itself, if that's possible, was the subsequent frenzied celebration by the gibbons, which included much hugging, high-fives, and unbridled flinging of feces. These were some very happy gibbons.
I've sworn off the zoo for life.
Tom Ruegger
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